I’m tweeting to nobody, but there must be pancakes somewhere….

I tweet several times a day….really funny stuff–probably my best advice, observations, and jokes, but no one sees it. I’ve been told this is a generational thing; that my friends simply don’t tweet. If my friends don’t tweet @me, who will?

I follow wonderfully talented strangers; those with unusual and strange talents follow me.  My first follower, followed every Alexis D. in the U.S.—all 347 of us. Weird, right? My second follower’s likes/interests included the most obscene hobby/activity I’ve ever seen.  I’m not even sure if it’s legal.

Apparently, it is a bad thing to be followed by someone with no followers which explains why no one follows me.  I have only one follower. This is close enough to zero to make me the weirdo. To put my shameful number of 34 tweets, 1 follower, following 11 into perspective, look at the stats of my secret mentor:

Justine Musk has 6,909 tweets, 10,519 followers, and is following 7,849. Good for her; bad for me.  I started following her after she posted the most brilliant piece of writing I’d ever seen “…..there must be pancakes somewhere…..” Brilliant, right? She had me at pancakes and I’ve been searching for them ever since.

The postings I follow and try to mimic are random, thought provoking, funny, serious, and at times, poetic. I’m just starting to catch on. I guess it’s a good thing no one is listening to me.  I know I’m not.  I’m not taking myself seriously, either. I’m too busy searching for pancakes and followers, and when I do finally find them I will probably still be tweeting to nobody.